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Shine

by Cameron Smith

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1.
I was looking for permission To become what I am Like I was sent here on a mission To make you give a damn Now I know what I ain’t looking for It's when and where to be ignored Ever after and before I’d slip into a pattern But for who? Cause I know exactly What it’s gonna take to free my mind Now I’ve had enough to play And now I’m thinking it’s time I’m thinking it’s time Time, time to be alone Time, time to be full grown You used to say that All the best storytellers were liars I'd linger on your every word Like they were pale blue eyes Now when the big one hits I’m still too dumb to even realize That the joke you said You had just wrote I’d heard a hundred times Before, before, before Again and again So it won’t be me to volunteer But someone really ought to do something Before it’s time Before it’s time It's time, time to be alone And it’s time, time to leave home We used to shout and ball our fists And shake our wallets at G-d We swallowed lots and tasted little And exposed you as a fraud Now when the hard rain is falling Sideways down the locker hall A hero child rushes the black hole Coming for us all It’s tragic and true And commonplace as alcohol We sold those kids out And called it inevitable And I know you know I know you know that it’s true And I know, I know, I know You don’t know what to do You don't know what to do Yeah, but you do Know what to do And it’s time For something entirely new
2.
David didn’t finish his verse Hemingway didn’t touch his breakfast And even I don’t want to be fifty two Directing kids in a play called No Exit No, I don’t want to be thirty one Obsessed with money How much and where I'm getting it You know that I was raised on cheap cigarettes And when it rains I always let it Splashing in puddles on my pillow Singing words that David twists into rhyme Can he see what he means to the people like me? Do you see at all from the other side? I never knew what I was looking for But I know all my favorite places to hide Now no one is asking So I’ll say it again Before I wander all through the night (I wanna wonder through the night) I know it’s dark and I know it’s cold I know that beyond means on the other side But if you can still hear me If you can still feel things Things don’t got to feel alright Some days I like to feel nothing I believe that nothing likes to feel me too I chased a junk wax era MacGuffin All the way down Rue Morgue Avenue I meant to ask the painter what that matter was Why is the sky always looking so blue? Well Steve picked up a brush And just scratched her head In the way only an artist would do (In the way only an artist could do) We never settled the argument Over who gets to explain hurt to who But I risked becoming some embodiment Of sweet content when I would listen to you I can’t blame anyone for having enough They turned brokenness into a career Like the largest shard in a pile of broken glass Poses the bottle as an idea (Now it's just an idea) I know it’s dark and I know it’s cold Well I know the black road is a river in Crimea But if you can still hear me If you can still keep moving Things don’t got to end right here Oh no, things don't got to end right here Things don't got to feel alright Oh no, things don't got to feel alright
3.
Wildfires 04:22
When my friend Jordan Moved back home from California There were wildfires there Swarming residential areas And it was awful People died It looked like Hell finally arrived But even Hell isn't quite as hot As they advertise I think I need to rest my eyes I just need to rest my eyes He said “LA is a strange place People running around in a rat race People working on their old face While the planet turns up the heat” I said, “That sounds kinda like fun Maybe I wanna ride into the sun I’ll place my faith in something dumb And even do it blind" Well I think I need to rest my eyes Yeah, I just need to rest my eyes Well don’t you miss the ocean? He said, “Never once did I notice it" I guess it’s hard to miss anything That is still within your reach But sometimes I'm looking at the sky And I see an empty space inside A reflection of the night Inside my soul out on the beach And that is when I'm thinking about him Like I think about all of them And I wonder if I’m going To wherever they’ve arrived You know it ain't as hard To live without them As it's hard to watch life just go on But I think maybe We’re like the ocean and its tides And I think I need to rest my eyes I just need to rest my eyes
4.
5.
6.
Snake eyes 03:43
7.
Belladonna 04:29
8.
Gold 03:21
9.
Shine 06:12
Stepping out into the cold night Sidewalks sparkle in the street light They wanna shine just like the stars shine Long since dead but far from gone And it reminds me of those old times Being trapped inside of a cold mind Spent most all of my adult life Trudging in shackles made of snow It’s like everyday is Groundhog Day Watching every strand of hair go gray The shade of sky when it’s freezing rain And there’s no work left can be done When you’re all alone and punched out Sinking deeper into debt and doubt When you think back upon the trade now Did they take more than they gave you? What’s a man if he can’t reach out Like the light upon the street now Like the shining and the speed And how it keeps those stars up in the sky? When our babies have all grown old I hope they know what we have never known Some kinda hope that really feels like home Some country they can call their own Til then we’re changing day to day Like the rain when it evaporates Maybe we‘ll still come a long way Where the children play they’ll grow Sometimes it’s taking too long Just to grow myself full grown I want to shine long I hope we shine on
10.
Dogshit 02:33

about

A mid-fi collection of indie folk songs inspired by love, legacy, and life after death.

The home recording process began as demos for a would-be soundtrack commissioned by the late, great artist, Jeremy Joel. Originally intended to be featured in a documentary about the closing of Joel's SAM Gallery due to complications surrounding the pandemic, plans for the film were scrapped after Jeremy's sudden passing in May of 2020.

As that summer crept on, those tracks began to evolve into the album Shine after Smith began sharing the demos with multi-instrumentalist and singer-songwriter, Eric Osbourne. Collaborating remotely due to lockdowns and the ongoing pandemic, Smith and Osbourne recorded, arranged and mixed the album almost entirely on their phones.

The fidelity of the recording, the unorthodox techniques, and the "by any means necessary" approach to creation quickly grew to reflect the character of Jeremy's work. Perhaps best illustrated by Joel's own words and voice on "Some Things Last a Long Time"; a cover of a song penned by fellow artist and Texas native Daniel Johnston:

"The first paintings I ever did, I didn't have brushes. I just used my fingers, y'know? It was very childlike--the process--it was very childlike.."

-Jeremy Joel, 1982-2020

Shine is dedicated to the memory of Jeremy Joel, a brilliant storyteller, and loving father and friend; and to his children Baillie, Izabella, and Lucas.

credits

released March 18, 2022

All songs written by Cameron Smith except "Some Things Last a Long Time" written by Daniel Johnston & Jad Fair, and "Gold" written by Emmylou Harris

Mixed by Cameron Smith and Eric Osbourne with help from Mark Randall
Mastered by Mark Randall

Cameron Smith - Vocals, guitar, bass, drum machining, bass, melodica, keys, singing saw

Eric Osbourne - Back up vocals, synth, guitar, drums/percussion, viola

Mark Randall - Upright bass on "Gold"

Cover art by Jeremy Joel

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